HAPPINESS IS STILL THE BEST REVENGE

If you know me in real life, you can attest that I would never take revenge on someone. At least not when it isn't in the context of a joke. Vengeance is not in my nature maybe because I know damn so well that it's tantamount to holding on to a grudge, nurturing a double-edged blade that hurts me more than it would hurt the other person. It's a complete waste of energy and really, it doesn't do anything rather than making me miss out all the chances to be happy.

Today, I have finally confirmed my theory about why he came and left so suddenly. Much as I'd like to curse at him and tell to his face that I don't deserve to be treated that way, I just know I'll have to keep my cool. He's got a problem, he tried to make me the solution, and he failed. I'm not a bandage to his wounded heart. Let's be clear on that.

Although it still feels like all hell breaks loose, I would never take revenge on him. As they say, the best revenge is living well, which is actually what is happening to me. I won't hurt him consciously, but I know that I also would never let him close enough to hurt me again. :)

And I Chose To Be Grateful and Happy...

Psalm 34:18 says "The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit."

This, apparently, is the core of today's gospel. I've always known that this quote exists but because I don't really read the Bible regularly, I have forgotten about it, even at that time when I was literally brokenhearted.

So when I attended the Mass today, I was almost teary-eyed the whole time. I don't know. It felt like God was talking to me. It was as if it's His way of saying that the worst is over, that He will heal me, that I can start all over again. Now. :)

The officiating priest said during his sermon that all of our brokenness, the trials we face, the sufferings we endure--- they are all designed by God so we can appreciate life even more. There's always a rainbow after the storm. And yes, I'm holding on to every word.

Looking back, I could have rant all I want about the way my life turned out. There was a time when I saw life unfold the way I wanted it to be, and I thought all I need was a little more time so it would come to its full circle. Little did I know that it wasn't even real to begin with. When I realized that I don't stand a chance at having that one thing I thought I could wait forever for, my heart wasn't just broken; it was shattered to pieces.

I could have chosen to wallow in pain, to be depressed and curse at the world. But God's love made me reconsider. I am just too blessed to complain about that painful experience. The blessings He abundantly showers upon me outweigh all the rejection and pain caused by some people who don't see my worth. So, I prayed for healing, and healing He bestowed upon me.

The gospel has reaffirmed to me what I always believed in: that God is a faithful God. He heals the brokenhearted. He always presents a way to start all over again, with the lessons learned from the painful past. Really, gratefulness and happiness are our personal choices. And as for me, they are my top picks. :)

Another goodbye, but hopefully for my better path.

It all started when a college classmate and I unexpectedly bumped into each other in one of the popular fast food chains along Bajada. He was with his boss and other officemates. He asked me if I still write and if I'm interested in applying for content writer in their company, located in the metro's tallest building.

Days after, I applied and got accepted. It was a good thing since NSO ended a month ago, I'm running out of cash and our house was under renovation then, making it not conducive for bumming around. The setup was actually favorable for me - flexible time schedule (report any time, just make sure you will work for 9 hours a day), nice working environment and doing what I am passionate about -- writing. I worked as a content writer and used a spinning software for a month before so I was somehow confident I am armed with the skills and experience needed.


Admittedly, I had some level of difficulty when I was starting out, but my project manager is patient and she never gave up on me. Along the way, I learned the ropes and the ins and outs of the business. I managed to whip off articles with minimum revisions and reached the imposed quota. Later on, I also tried my hand at doing IT stuff, but I was more focused on writing.

5 months and 2 weeks since I joined Ultro Sourcing, I found myself bidding farewell to my current work, my officemates and the company. Where to? Davao City Water District. I will be working as one of the 5 Customer Service Assistants.

The pay will be lesser, the work schedule will be fixed, the pressure would be around the office. But why did I accept such? Career growth and stability, something that an outsourcing company like Ultro can't offer. So with a heavy heart, I left Ultro last Wednesday, June 1. But not without a party. Here are some pics from our merriment.

the closest I'll ever get to having a group pic.

Before we ate, I noticed they were passing this card around so I knew that they would give me a token of remembrance. I know they intended to surprise me but due to time constraints, they can't. But as destiny would have it (char!), I'm still so surprised how the card carried a comic atmosphere. :)) Why? Take a peek. :)

oh these people, see how they love to play pun on words, or names, rather. :)) and look how the 'from' and 'to' were interchanged! HAHAHA.

not-so VERY VERY VERY SMALL card from all of them. yiheeee!

...tadaaa! the messages! I really had a good laugh reading each. I'm amazed how witty, funny, random and out-of-this-world the advices could get. Everything's okay but I noticed the 'Have a Happy Birthday!' line! HAHAHAHA. ok, I know how hard it is to find a jumbo-sized card that isn't meant for the natal day. Nevertheless, I am still so touched by the sweet gesture.


I'll miss them big time. More than I'd like to admit. :(

I could only hope I'll be up for something better, and have a happier life. :)

Career Blues

I know I'm a promising, young professional who has all my career life before me.

I can go places. I can contribute a lot to the industry. I have talent.

Yes, I'm aware of it.

So I shouldn't be stuck here.

In 2011, I'm gonna do these. *fingerscrossed*

1. Learn to cook not-so-easy dishes.
2. EXERCISE, for Chrissake!
3. Update blog frequently.
4. Watch classic and animated movies.
5. Read top-selling books (Sophie's World, A Tale of Two Cities, God of Small Things, etc.)
5. grow hair longer. :D *weeee...first time in 2 years*
6. invest on pricey-but-definitely-worth it skin products
7. have a QWERTY phone. kahit yung Cherry lang. :D
8. eat well. avoid acids i.e. softdrinks!
9. save money!
10. and of course, how else am I going to do #9 if I won't be financially stable? So, find a course-related and well-compensating job! :D

Just a Thought.

The more guys I know, the more I am convinced that they are all the same. It's like meeting many different guys but seeing one and the same character.

I have so many acquaintances and friends who happen to be guys. Some are already in a relationship. But my woman's instinct and even common sense tell me that, for crying out loud, their actions can be classified as...flirtatious.

Yep, I can tell. I mean, what can you say when they're actually asking you to go home with them, or meet up with you for what they claim as a 'friendly date'? What the eff.

I'm not that dumb not to know your schemes! And so, I stopped communicating with them, by all means.

Which made me ponder on the thought stated in that pic above. With everything I went through, I sincerely hope that I can be that girl who will make the player forget he even entered the game field. C'mon, you boys should know the fine line between promoting friendship and being coquettish. It really isn't nice to play around, especially if emotions are involved.

And for you guys who are already into a commitment, think of your girlfriends please. Duh.

2010: One of my Best Years. Ever. :)

As everyone in the long stretch of our street went inside their respective houses after several minutes of blowing horns made of disposable plastic cups and counting down to officially welcome the new year, it dawned on me that it signals the start of really 'living' in 2011.

It is one thing to go out in the streets, making all sorts of noises from hooting to blowing horns to dragging cans attached to the back part of the vehicle while it's moving. It's another thing to be in the quiet and comfort of your home, enjoying delectable dishes served in the Media Noche. It's an intimate way of family bonding and yes, we can all reflect on what's in store for us in the coming 12 months. But the previous year also deserves to be given a glance before we bid it goodbye.

2010 had been a pretty good one for me, to say the least. It was a year full of changes, transitions and challenged my ability to adapt and adjust in no time. There were a lot of first times too.

I tried a very short Korean hairstyle for the first time and apparently, people were praising me coz the cut suit me well. I know it cost me five times my regular haircut budget but with compliments I was getting everyday, it's all worth it.

Seeing my peers make a graceful exit dubbed as college graduation tugged my heartstrings. I was left behind for another six weeks since I had to complete one major and one minor subject before finally earning my degree. It meant extension for my ATENEWS EICship also. A national convention was held in Bacolod for almost a week and as the only editor enrolled during that time, I took the duty of canvassing for tickets, hotels and all that. With three members under my wing, we attended the convention and I was absent in my classes. I can no longer imagine how I was able to multitask listening to the talks with a photocopy of our Philosophy of Religion in one hand. You see, I needed to study so I'll be on the same page as the class took on the same lesson by then. But the convention was truly enriching and the side trip to Cebu was fun so I got through it smoothly.

The National Elections also happened during this year. After casting the peoples vote and with the aid of technology that are PCOS machines, the country now has a different set of leaders. I am hoping for the best. May the people's vote not be a waste by malpractice and anomalies. I know that politics has always been dirty. I just hope they won't stain it more.

After all the defense and exams, I officially graduated from college with no graduation rites, no preparations, no graduation dinner, no graduation gifts, no nothing at all. I could care less, what's important for me is that I survived college after eight regular semesters and four summer classes! From a colegiala, I have now become a professional who has to pay 7 pesos minimum in a jeepney ride. I admit, sometimes, it's tempting to pay just only 6, just like the old times. :))

Then started my bum life. I rested and chilled but not really since I still had to go back to school and apply for the diploma, clearance, etc. After a month, a college friend offered me a home-based online writing job which I accepted eagerly. I wrote about hen parties (UK setting) and used spinning software. It only lasted for a month as the boss lacked the funds to continue getting my services.

I wasn't idle for long though since NSO hired me. There I had a not-so-challenging with an above-average compensation on a killer schedule. Haha. Truly, I learned to budget my time and make some sacrifices by waking up way early for my 6am duty or going home at more or less 12 in the midnight from my 3pm duty. But the people I worked with are keepers so I couldn't thank NSO enough for bringing our paths together. :)

Life after NSO meant staying in our house and having to endure all the noise, mess and a lot of chaos while our house was under renovation/repaint. It certainly bored me so I had to find ways to get out of the house. When I saw an old college classmate again and informed me of a vacant writing position in their office (which is situated in the tallest building in the metro), I applied days after and got hired. What a pity because the house repair was almost finished the time when they told me to report for duty. :( But still, I am more than thankful for the salary and more than that, I am glad for having something to be busy with. I guess sitting around the whole day with no goal in mind just doesn't sit with me well. I can feel I am shortchanging myself doing nothing.

Come Christmas season, my aunt who is now based in Japan spent her holidays here with us. Thus, on Christmas eve, everyone from my father's side gathered in our house as we had a Christmas program and gift giving session. It was good to see everyone of them for the first time. I realized I have a lot of pamangkins already. They were all so adorable! It was even better going around the place, greeting each one with a hug as our eyes were filled with tears. Truly, we are all so touched with this once in a lifetime family event. And of course, it was the best with all the tasty treats served in the Noche Buena. After that, we all slept in the house. All 31 of us, imagine!

Last night was New Year's eve. It's the first time to celebrate this special beginning with my immediate family. I am used to having my aunts and uncles around during New Year but this year is different and I love the refreshing change.

In a nutshell, I view the past year as a time when growing up is a requirement as major decisions are needed to be made. I learned how to step out of my comfort zone and give importance to my hard-earned money as well. I also learned how to relate with other people, especially those in authority, in a professional way. 2010 was truly one of the best years in my 20 years of existence.

And now, I'll say 'Hello there, 2011! Rock my world, Year of the Metal Rabbit!' :)